We've read a fair amount of books in preparation for this adoption. If you know David or me, I'm sure you're not surprised--we're both preppers. :) A lot of the books cover worst case scenarios, talking about the effects of being in an institution, the problems with lack of stimulation in the first year, sensory disorders, attachment issues, and the list goes on. It's best to be prepared for the worst, I suppose, but I also hear plenty of stories where the family integration and attachment is not so bad, or even pretty good.
And right now, about all I can do is pray and ask God to let that be the case for us. As someone pointed out yesterday, He's the only one at this point who knows the identity of our child. It's very tempting to do a bit of negotiating in my prayers, something along the lines of:
"You know we're adopting with small children, right? And we think this is what you want for us now...so perhaps for this first adoption, the one with small children, could we have an easier one?"
"I know that to him who has been given much, much will be expected. And you've given David and me so much...but maybe for the adoption, could you not expect too much?"
It's more difficult to ask God for the adoption scenario that brings Him the most glory, whether that be a wonderfully smooth one or a very difficult one. Whatever happens, at least He is in control, and as I tell myself often, He will give us the strength to face it.
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